I’m All About Options – Vintage Dark Humor Hoodie | Fat Merman Designs 💀✨

$49.99 – $54.99Price range: $49.99 through $54.99

Life is unpredictable—your hoodie shouldn’t be. The “I’m All About Options” Vintage Dark Humor Hoodie wraps you in cozy fleece while announcing to the world that you prefer flexibility, chaos, and a healthy dose of gallows humor. With its bold retro skull graphic, it’s the perfect blend of comfort and dark wit.

Wear it on cold mornings, late-night existential rambles, or any moment where you need warmth, caffeine, and at least three backup plans. This hoodie understands you. Maybe too well.

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💀 I’m All About Options Hoodie

This midweight hoodie wraps you in warmth and delightfully dark humor—perfect for chilly mornings, late-night conversations, or any day you’re feeling just a little unhinged in the best possible way. The 50/50 cotton-poly blend keeps things cozy without the bulk, and the seamless tubular construction gives it that easy, universally flattering fit. A roomy kangaroo pocket and color-matched drawcord keep everything looking sharp, even when your sense of humor takes a turn for the… practical.

On the front: the clean, bold Fat Merman logo—crisp, simple, unmistakably ours. On the back: the vintage I’m All About Options artwork featuring distressed typography and three retro woodcut illustrations—a coffin, an urn, and a roaring woodchipper—because everyone appreciates having choices.

Whether you’re grabbing coffee, handling errands, attending questionable gatherings, or reminding people you think ahead, this hoodie brings warm comfort with a perfectly morbid grin.

💀 Product Features

Medium-heavy 50/50 cotton-poly fabric (8.0 oz/yd²) — soft, warm, and durable
Kangaroo pocket for hand warmth + stashing essentials
Color-matched drawcord + double-lined hood for a clean, finished look
Seamless tubular knit for smooth fit and reduced fabric waste
High-quality DTF/DTG prints: front logo + back Options design

💀 Care Instructions

Machine wash cold (max 30°C / 90°F)
Tumble dry medium
Iron, steam, or dry on low heat
Do not dry clean
Use non-chlorine bleach if needed

🪸 About Fat Merman Designs
We create expressive, offbeat artwork with personality, humor, and a bold streak of dark charm. Thanks for supporting small creators who believe a great hoodie should make people laugh, gasp, or back away slowly—in the best way.